Good news, citizens! The government has finally made shampoo cheaper, so at least your hair can shine, even if your wallet doesn’t. Sadly, for people like me who are losing hair, this reform won’t wash.

Toothpaste, soap, and bicycles have joined the “luxury to necessity” list, now taxed at only 5%. That means you can brush, bathe, and pedal into a brighter future, all while chanting “#NextGenGST.”

For farmers, GST on agricultural equipment has been slashed. Now they can buy tools at lower prices to grow crops, which will be taxed later anyway. It’s the circle of fiscal life.

The real winners, however, are small car and motorcycle owners. Yes, you too can now vroom around with reduced GST, while potholes remain 100% exempt from repair.

Healthcare got its share too: life-saving drugs are now tax-free. Of course, finding the medicine in stock may still require divine intervention, but at least the taxman won’t add insult to injury.
And in the insurance sector, GST has been scrapped from policies. Finally, a scheme where you can pay premiums without wondering whether you should insure your life or your sanity.

Meanwhile, traders are thrilled that inverted duty structures are “corrected.” Nobody knows what that means, but it sounds like the Council has been hard at work straightening India’s tax yoga poses.
The best news is reserved for ‘sin goods’ users - pan masala, cigarettes, gutkha, and chewing tobacco, along with sugary aerated drinks and cold beverages. These will now proudly attract a 40% GST.
As the Union Finance Minister announced these reforms, common citizens everywhere nodded in agreement: “At last, the government has delivered what we truly needed - cheaper bhujia and noodles.”
So go ahead, celebrate the dawn of Next-Gen GST. Because while the economy may be complex, at least your soap bar is now affordable.